Thinking of Moms…Thinking of Kids…Thinking of Stories

Happy Mother’s Day, in America. This is our Big Day! This post is about the stories of mothering. Do we know our own Mother’s stories? Have we told our own personal stories? I want to share with you one of my stories- a Mother’s Day story. Then, let’s look at two books that will encourage you to learn more about Your Mother, Yourself, and Your Children.

My Story

The church I grew up in celebrated Mother’s Day by inviting all the women of the church to the annual “All Daughter’s Banquet”. What a wonderful way to include everyone, and make every woman feel special. Each year, more than 200 women gathered and brought their mothers, grandmothers, daughters, nieces and friends. What fun it was to have a reunion with these lovely people.

The evening began with a punch bowl and finger food. One year, someone brought their Polaroid camera so we were able to take photos and insert them in a decorated frame for everyone. Then we had a special dinner, that the men helped prepare. (They also ran the dishwasher afterwards.)

It was a big honor to serve on the banquet committee, and quite a commitment, too. I began my All-Daughters career as a server, carrying plates of food, refilling beverage glasses, and the best part- presenting the special dessert. Then, I moved up to to small performances. I read a scripture one year; a Mother’s Day poem the next. I appeared in a play.

In a few years I made it to a chairperson status- I was in charge of the entire after-dinner entertainment. I thought and thought- the program was the highlight of the evening. We’d had our fill of talent shows and fashion shows; I searched for something special.  Finally, a friend told me that her father was in a harmonica orchestra. I decided to give them a try. Over thirty performers showed up, with harmonicas teeny to giant and entertained us with the old standards. What a night of hugs, smiles and lovely memories!

And then I went home…and the sweet girl from next door, the babysitter, met me with a concerned look. “I don’t think Charlie feels good,” she said. “He went to bed early.”

I rushed to his bedroom. “I think Charlie has the chicken pox,” I replied. Happy Mother’s Day!

While we are all daughters, many of us are also mothers.  We are all learning as we go.

In our social media age, we can read blog after blog, and see post after post about the joys and challenges of being a mother. We can learn how to be a better mother. We can commiserate with other mothers when we a hectic moment gets the best of us.

A few weeks ago, I shared a marvelous book with you, Collecting Conversations- 100 women sharing everyday thoughts, by Sam Bunch The women she visited with ranged from their 20’s to 90’s.  Let’s see what these women have to say about children. And I will share my thoughts, too. (And I’d love to hear your thoughts). The author introduced the question, “Children are a true polarity in life.. a blessing…an amazing experience. But they are also exhausting, a huge responsibility and a cause for worry. Then she asked,

What Do You Think About Children?

Here are some answers…

I thought I’d have two and I ended up with six. They are my life and soul…if I didn’t have them I wouldn’t be able to breathe.

My Kids have made me become the real me.

I was a subconscious box-ticker with a five year plan until I had children- that sorted that nonsense out.

The best thing I ever did in my life. I didn’t mind if I didn’t have a life partner- I wanted kids. It feels so much better to have a hug.

I wish I knew then what I know now, then I would have enjoyed them when they were little.

I’m happy I had kids. I wasn’t maternal. I ran out of the pill and got pregnant.

I enjoy the presence of youth and the joy we get from our younger generation.

What would the world be without babies?

Here’s how I would answer the question about kids.

In my 20’s, I was going to school and having fun as a newlywed. In my 30’s, I woke up one day and wanted to have kids. My baby quest required some prayers, and God sent us two boys, the best in the world.  Babies and little kids are so smart and energetic. They become real people so fast. You rock them to sleep and tuck them in each night and before you know it, they’ve jumped out of their crib on their own in the morning and they’re building a cardboard box pop machine and a paper-mache volcano, and tearing off on their trikes and bikes before you’ve packed away the baby clothes.

In my 40’s, I loved seeing their interests blossom- the small animal phase, sports, singing, computers. It amazed me that they had so many definite wants and desires. Many, many, wants and desires. They were ready to leave the nest by the time they were 8, but I held on to them until college. By my 50’s they had flown way ahead of me. I marveled at the contrails they left in my life.

Now, as I enjoy my 60’s, I love them so much! We can talk about real things! Who needs Siri or Aexa? They know everything! The newest restaurants, the coolest cocktails, politics, electric cars, the best shows to binge-watch, wood pellet versus gas grills, recipes and why I need a hood over my stove, and how things work, from fibrillators to Facebook.

And so my answer would be- It’s been a delight to have kids! I love books, and I love movies and TV and Broadway shows, but nothing can top having these two fabulous people in my life! And if there were crazy days, I don’t remember them.

Love the kids in your life! Your kids, your nieces and nephews, your friends’ kids, the neighbor kids playing ball in your flowers!

Your Turn to Create a Story

Would you like to ask your Mom questions about her life and thoughts? Or would you like to share more of yourself with your children and family?

Author Glenna Mageau has created a lovely book for you that will get you started! She recognizes that it’s not always easy for us to delve into feelings and stories with our parents, so she has given us some tools to make us all feel comfortable we explore past memories. Here’s my review of her helpful book.

Do You Know Your Mom’s Story?: 365 Questions You Need to Ask Her by Glenna Mageau
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Part-memoir and part non-fiction, this book is also a gift to you, your mother and your family. The woman that raised you is amazing, but not perfect. And woman forget to honor themselves. This book is a loving and positive place to start learning more about your mother and to raise her up.

Author Glenna Mageau’s compassionate and understanding words will encourage you to explore your Mom’s history. This guide is not just a list of routine, factual questions. The author asks us to meet our mother where she is at.

How meaningful it will be to learn more about your Mom’s journey- as her own person, the woman behind the label of “Mom” of “Wife.” We all want to know that we matter. This heartwarming book will help you both understand each other and help you to start a deeper connection with your mother and then keep the conversations going. But the author recognizes that some relationships have much more pain than others.

We forget that times have changed, and each generation faced different challenges and expectations. How illuminating it will be to enter your mother’s world. The author believes it may help you grow, mend, or heal your relationship with your mother.

This book provides a wonderful variety of questions. You don’t have to go through all 365, neither do you have to start at the beginning. Start where you and you Mom will feel comfortable.

My own mother was talkative about her own life and memories. After reading the questions in this book, I know I would have liked to learn more. Here are some of the questions that resounded with me:
Who did she have the most fun with in her family?
When did she learn to drive? Who taught her?
What were her parents’ expectations for her life?
Where does she believe she got her strength from over the years, to deal with all the occurred in her life? What is her advice for getting through tough situations?
Who was the worst boss she ever had?
What is she most proud of in her life?

I recommend this book. It will help you to have a heart to heart talk with your mother about her life, her dreams, and her beliefs. What a gift- to get to know the woman who is your mother.

Thanks to NetGalley and Books Go Social for a review copy. This is my honest review.

View all my reviews